Right, I'm going to make this brief to catch up the time I lost watching the film.
It's about two hunter-gatherers (Jack Black, Michael Cera [Rather upset at him becoming part of this film after Superbad and Juno]) who go from bad to worse to weird to worse in their quest to save two good-looking members (June Diane Raphael, Juno Temple) of their tribe, who had become slaves due to Jack Black's character's clumsiness. They go through a series of biblical events leading to the place of their romances' captivity and rescue them, becoming wiser in the process. Naturally they get the girls and everyone is happy. There, now I've saved you the time you would waste watching it. You are welcome!
There is no real cinematic value to speak of here, so the only way this film would not be an utter piece of rubbish is if it was funny. Which it is not. You will understand when they are making jokes, but it will not make you laugh.
Ironically, as the main character eats the fruit of knowledge he becomes wiser, you watching it, will not. You will become more stupid. So don't.
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