Machete

Right, speaking of ridiculous.... If you are the kinda guy who looks at a film and says "that car chase would never happen because the power to weight ration of the escaping car is blah blah blah blah blah..." and "he would never survive the crash because his head has the same density as a watermelon and blah blah blah.." then you are better off going back to your lab, because this film is simply ridiculous.

No joke, it's sort of Once Upon a Time in Mexico meet Shoot 'Em Up, plus added ridiculousness.

Sadly the opening fight is the best in the film in my opinion and there is a greater chance in every member of the film crew being hit by meteorites while they are equally distributed across the earth than the final battle going down as it did. However, combine Jessica Alba, Lindsey Lohan and Michelle Rodriguez in the same film and we, my friends have got a movie on our hands!

No, seriously, go and see this, its freakin' amazing! Totally absurd and brilliant at the same time. (just make sure you have a few beers before and have plenty of snacks and you're sorted!)

Clash of the Titans

What I don't understand is why we have to make stupid. Yeah, its all about crakens or however you spell that, and medusa etc. but even taken that into consideration, I felt it was stupid. Secondly, I didn't get the feeling like it was a quest. Maybe I have been spoiled by LOTR and Star Wars and other endless trilogies, quadrologies, gadzilliologies, but there was no sense of occasion. When when the main guy was on the pegasus to the final fight, I thought to myself - "Already? All you did is have two fights before and slapped some witches' eye around."

Only thing I liked about this film was the lead. I really like Sam Worthington now. Alas, there wasn't much else in there. Even the battles made ma wanna go make tea instead.

So what you can really do is give this one a miss and watch 300 or Troy again instead... they are far far better.

Brothers

So it's dark. It's twisted. It's simple. It's edgy. It's brilliant.

Story of a brother that deploys to Afghanistan, is supposed dead but makes an unlikely comeback to find his place in the family replaced by his brother. Mentally, it's kind of like Jarhead and The Messenger combined, but with a twist. Sounds good right? Well it is.

Besides, if you, for some unimaginable reason like me, enjoy Jake Gyllenhaal, then you are all sorted and there really is no reason for you not to go see this film.

The Other Guys

I will now capture the essence of this film in three sentences. Have you ever seen Anchorman? If yes, then you might get a laugh or two out of this one. If no, then watch this, you will love it and once you are done, watch Anchorman because you will laugh your sides off.

That was two sentences. Well, you know what they say, sixty per cent of the time it works every time. Honestly, Will Ferrell is extremely funny, but I don't think it came out as much in this. On the other hand, Mark Wahlberg really stole the show here. If you have been reading my reviews, you will remember that monsieur Wahlberg can only play one character. Well this was perfect for him because normally when he plays the backstreet tough guy with nothing-to-lose attitude, he just looks silly and as credible as a koala pretending to be a grizzly bear. But let him play the same role in a film where this anger is supposed to look over the top and ridiculous and you have a combination worth gold.

It is a definite must-see film that will leave you rolling on the floor. Just try not to choke on your popcorn.

Toy Story 3

I guess there really isn't much to say about this one. The people who are into Toy Story will see it and the people who aren't won't. It's just that kind of a film.

Which makes it even more surprising, that having not seen 1 or 2, I, who I'm not really bothered about such films saw it. Bits were funny and, having been explained the whole plot malarky, I kind of understood what made it tick. People who you could tell were proper into it were in tears by the end. I, however, was not. It just isn't my type of film, so thus there wasnt much cinematographic value in it for me. Which, looking back, didn't stop me one bit from having fun, so you might as well give it a go.

But like I said in the beginning - if you're into it, you will enjoy it, you you aren't, you probably won't.

The Ghost Writer

I'm really undecided on this one. The plot was clever, I guess but it felt so dragged on that I lost interest in it and started looking for other things to keep me entertained. The scenery sparks to mind as, after all, films are a visual art. Sadly, the setting of the film was about as interesting as watching an 80-year old man's hair grow. Yes, its creepy and nothing will ever happen, just like the film.

At the same time, there were twists and turns in the story line, Ewan McGregor could have been worse, Brosnan couldn't, and the ending was a bit of a loose end. So it sounds pretty decent, no?

Oh I can't make up my mind, just go, watch it and then let me know what you thought.

The Daybreakers

Has anyone ever seen a worse film? No, I'm serious. Actually, wait, I take that back now that I've remembered some people decided to make High School Musical 1,2 and even 3, which are also known as the worst films in the history. I'd rather go have a wall of death with a pack of rhinos than watch those 3. But in all seriousness, The Daybreakers is just an awful, awful film.

There was only one thing I mildly enjoyed throughout the hour and a half of utter disgust - the concept of blood running out. Basics of supply and demand were covered, except if human blood was exchanged like a commodity as food, the whole market would have collapsed ages before they came to the situation when people realise there isn't any left. Just like what's gonna happen to us when we stop finding new places to drill oil from.

So here's an honest suggestion - why don't you go and watch a documentary about drilling oil rather than waste time on this crap?